WHERE AM I ???

         Tess: 🤭Home !

           Me: What day is it ??????

Tess: Thursday.

Me: 😦What happened to Wednesday ???

Tess: 😞 You slept through it.... and Thunderbirds day.

Me: 😃 You're kidding !!!

Tess:  No. 😢

Me: 😬.

My Tess says I was sleeping so deeply that she almost called a doctor. She's said that about 5 times

since we came home. What can I say ? I missed my own bed🛏️. 😁

Hey Kids, 

How's everybody doing ???

We came back to New York two weeks ago. Our housesitters, a French Canadian couple who have been with me since before Tess arrived in 2009, kept the house, the dog and my horse safe and sound for about 6 months 😌, so we've sent them off to Montreal for a little R&R on the two of us 🧳✈️.

The dog,

 who didn't seem to know if we'd been gone for 6 months or  6 minutes😆, greeted us warmly🥰. 

My horse 

gave me a "Do I know you 😒?" glance and went on chewing his alfalfa. "Someone" was apparently expecting a present.🎁🍎🍌🍪🍬💵. Message received😏.

Tess missed the pool🏝️🏊 and the ducks, Homer and Marge.

I missed my car 🚗 and my  favorite coffee cup☕  and we both missed the house 🏰 and Tess' "onsen" 🛀🏻🧖. 

We decided not to buy the house we looked at in Florida 🌴because when I asked Tess what she wanted for her birthday in July, she finally admitted that what she really wanted, was to go home 🤗. DONE !!!  My parents were a little disappointed, but they understood and we've promised to visit them more often and we'll have them here as soon as possible. Mrs. D was a lot harder to convince 😬, but I can be pretty persuasive when I need to be 💐💝💎😉. So, long story short (😆), we hopped the train 🚝 and came home. It's cooler here and we're in for some rain 🌧️ this week. Oh well, it'll be good for the crops 🤨🌾.

I've officially retired, although a couple of clients aren't sure where they're going to go yet, so I'll be helping with the change over the next month or so. A colleague sent me a link that listed PR as one of the top ten most stressful occupations. Thanks a lot, late Uncle Myron ☹️. As a kid, I thought of becoming a doctor 👨🏻‍⚕️, like my dad. As a teen, I wanted to write the Great American novel📚. During college, I worked summers for my aforementioned maternal uncle at his PR firm. It was exciting and I met a lot of famous, interesting people. (This isn't a kiss and tell, so I'm not going to name any🤐. ) After graduation, I traveled around Europe🏰🏔️🗼🧳 for a year and then came back and joined the firm. Seven years later, when my uncle died suddenly, I inherited the firm and it became my life. I married, became a father twice👦🏻👧🏻, travelled ✈️ too much , worked too many hours💼📱, eventually got divorced🎉, and traded the city 🏙️for the country 🌄 (at least on weekends).

The industry used to be great, but it's seen too many changes. The real stars are long gone, the glamour has faded and moviegoers want more and more of the same violence, profanity, superheroes and stupidity. 

Tess and I were raised on the Golden Age of Hollywood🎬 🎩🎥by our parents and grandparents. Back when screenwriters typed something other than slang and four letter words, actors and actresses were talented, good looking and likeable, movie studios were all actual studios with sound stages and backlots instead of independent production companies. A few remain, but it isn't the same.

The studio system wasn't necessarily a bad thing because it kept some people in line. Serious actors didn't kibosh their own careers by ignoring their more experienced handlers to choose schlock over substance.

 I was taught by my uncle to take care of my clients, to look after them, to protect them. It's a good practice, but it only works when your clients keep up their side. Creative people are......how can I put this nicely....🤔? Complicated. And when they're also stubborn , foolish, and self-destructive, you spend a lot of time hitting your head against a brick 🧱 wall. Then, you try to mend fences, run interference, do damage control and if you're really desperate to save them from themselves, you force your fiancée (😢) to help you cover for them and you both wind up in Hell 😬🔥!!! 

Oh well, all's well that ends well and I'm done with all of that, thank goodness ! A couple more years of that and I would've ended up like my Uncle Myron.🚬💣⚰️

Tess is still making pages for the movie blog and seems to be enjoying it. I'm hoping that when the holidays get closer, she'll come back over here and pretty the place up. Now that we're back home, I'm trying to decide what I'm going to do next, so made a list 📋.

 1 Sleep late 🛌🏻, have breakfast🥞🍳🥯🥣.....or brunch 😃, lunch 🍔🌭🥪🍟🍕and dinner 🍜🍗🍛🥩🍣🍝🍛🍧🍨🍦🥧🍰🧁🍪🍷☕.

2 Go swimming🏊. 

3 Clean the garage🧹😩. 

4 Walk the dog🐕. 

5 Wash my car🧽🚗. 

6 Hug and kiss My Tess a few dozen more times a day😘🥰🤗.

7 Soak in the onsen🛀🏻. 

8 Start chopping firewood for the upcoming cozy Autumn evenings🌋.

9 Dust off the gym equipment and start using it.😆🤞

10 Count my blessings. (I'm moving this one to Number 1). 😉

IS THERE A DOCTOR IN THE HOUSE 🤧🤒😷??? YES!!!

Hey Kids !!! Greetings from Sickie Central 😷.
Tess' mother started "feeling poorly" two days after St.Patrick's Day and took to her bed. A week later, My Tess followed, and then Lily. So, for the past eight days I have been Dr. Cham. Well, Male Nurse Cham might be more accurate. Besides making chicken soup and doling out cough medicine, cough drops, and aspirin I haven't had to do much, except worry. They've all been sleeping as much as possible and I've been pretty much on my own.

No, it isn't the Coronavirus. It's Acute Bronchitis. One of Mrs.D's ardent admirers is a doctor and he made a house call (does anyone still do that🤨???) and he even brought flowers 💐!!! I'd met him once before at Mrs. D's Japanese Easter karaoke party 🤨. Nice fellow.
At first,Mrs.D wouldn't let him in her room because she "didn't have her face on" 😱😆, but half an hour later, she agreed and after he looked in on Tess and Lily,  he said they all had bronchitis and that it would have to run it's course. After he left, I went to the computer to stock up on necessities and was shocked to find that our beloved WALMART was out of stock of a lot things on my list. Cough syrup, cough drops🍬, aspirin, rice🍚😯!!! When Tess is sick, she likes white rice with butter and frozen peas. I went to Ebay and found cough drops (3 pkgs for $15 ???) Oh, come on 😡!!! What kind of monster buys $2 cough drops and resells them for $5 ???  Now, when it comes to health, I say spare no expense, but that's ridiculous !
Then I remembered Tess' little "apothecary" in the garage. Luckily, she labeled the boxes so it didn't take me long to find it. (it took me longer to lift it. Hernia #4😵)I took it inside and unpacked it in the kitchen. There weren't any horehound drops, but among the herb packets I found horehound, her remedy recipe book and the little lozenge mold and got to work. Luckily, there was plenty of sugar, raw honey and lemons. Had I ever made cough drops before ? Uhhhh, no, but I've watched Tess do it a dozen times, give or take and .....how hard could it be to make tea, boil honey and sugar together and....OK, it was harder than it looked, but nine hours later I had a big batch of sorry looking cough candy and Tess said they were better than hers😁.

The chicken soup got a rave reviews from Mrs. D. She said it was "very nice"😕. When I made it, Tess was asleep and I didn't know which box her cookbooks were in (there are 5 boxes labeled books 📚. So I did the next best thing, I called my mom.

Me: Hey mom ! How are you doing ? How's Dad ?
My Mom: Sonny? (Not my real name 😄. ) Where are you?
Me:  🤨 In the next room. Where are you ?
That always makes her laugh.
My Mom: Oh, you.
Me: Everyone has Bronchitis and I need to make chicken soup. Can I have your recipe ?
My Mom: Oh no. Are you sure it isn't the Coronavirus?
Me: The doctor said Bronchitis.
My Mom : Oh no. Did you take them to the hospital?
Me: No, he came to the house. He said they were safer at home.
My Mom: That's going to cost a lot.
Me: No, he's an old friend of the family. I think he wants to marry Tess' mother.
My Mother : But, she's engaged to you!
Me: Not Tess ! Her mother ! Are you wearing your hearing aid ?
My Mother: Oh, you!
Me: So, can I have the recipe?
My Mother: Of course, honey !

So, a few hours later, I had a pot of chicken soup. When I delivered Mrs. D's, she pulled the duvet up to her chin and said "Mr. Cham, what ARE you doing in my boudoir ?  (😄She slays me.) Tess said it was "scrumptious" and Lily declared it "just what the doctor ordered".
Me: Actually, he didn't. He told me to feed you all pickled pigs feet, raw oysters and bacon flavored soda ! 🤢
She just looked at me. She's had eight years of my foolishness. She probably would've quit years ago, but she's devoted to My Tess and only tolerates me for her sake.

Well, the Dr. said this will last about three weeks, so I guess Easter will have to be postponed. It's Tess' favorite holiday, so we have to celebrate it.

I'm going to go and check on the ladies and then Tess and I are going to watch a movie, but we haven't decided on one yet. Something happy, something cheerful. She looks so tiny when she's sick and I get so frightened, so afraid of losing her. That's a fear I've had to face several times now.

And tho she be but little, she is fierce.


That describes my Tess to a T. Little and fierce. Lyanna Mormont fierce,(but in a prettier package) and it took a giant to bring HER down.

We've fought through worse together and I have my three best weapons. My Mom's chicken soup, Sunny Delight and horehounds. Lord Virus doesn't stand a chance !!!

 

OH, SEVEN HELLS !!!